Monday, June 1, 2009

Something's Gotta Change; Things Cannot Stay the Same

So I haven't actually talked to her since they returned from their night away. An anniversary celebration. Gag me.

But I have received a few text messages, and I saw some shit on Facebook. What a joke. They are in love again, or at least that is what she's telling herself. One night away - 30 hours total - and the problems of the world are solved. Voila! They must have magic in the water there!

Uh huh. They sat by the adults only pool, had some "great talks", went to a fancy dinner, played cards, drank, probably had sex. I shudder to think how he must order her around. I have some knowledge of their sex life. A little, not too much. I know that he is extremely selfish. And I don't mean he cums first and then falls asleep. I mean he demands that she perform acts on him as a kind of tit for tat. Something along these lines:

Him: So, you want to go out with your girlfriends? You can go but first you have to give me a blowjob now, and also give me one when you get home.
Gross, huh? I think so. I'm not a blowjob kind of gal, but that is just wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. If she and he were like sex kittens and constantly going at it, and if that's what they like, then it would be different. But it's not like that. He demands that she service him. Sick.

So anyway, all is well in their world. They are fine. They talked about a lot of things. They relaxed.

And now I'm actually more concerned. Because we all know there will be another blowup, probably in about 2 weeks is my prediction. But will she tell us when it happens? Will she keep us engaged in helping her sort all this out? Or will she stop telling us anything, because when she does, she knows we won't forget; we won't let up. We can't let her dismiss what he does to her and to their children.

I will see her this Wednesday. She's coming to my house for a party. I will probably get a chance to talk to her more then. I know she is going to say that everything is fine, that they talked, and had a great time together. I don't know what I'll say. Knowing me I'll be all-too-honest after a couple glasses of wine. I'm trying to stay politically correct. I'm trying to stay out of their business. I'm trying to remind myself there's nothing I can do except make my own wise choices. But every time I hear that she said they had a great time, I can't help but think it's great until the next time she gets choked. And it will happen. Sooner than she is expecting, I'm sure.


meg said...

blow jobs are gross ANYWAY you look at it. i've learned from my own life experiences that abuse NEVER goes away. that the mental may stop but that the physical flares up or vis versa. trust me. it's disneyland dad/husband/spouse now, but wait til he gets all worked up again and POW! it starts all over again, the lies, the promises, the tears, the hopes, the confusion, the embarresment, ect. and again, and again, and again. the cycle of abuse NEVER STOPS!!!!!!!!!!

Head Whiner said...

i know, that's why i am so worried. and so sick of the facebook fakeness. i don't know how to pretend when everything is alright, and then have to console her when everything is not alright.